Overheard in Vegas

We went to Vegas a month ago for a long weekend of fun and winnning lots of money!

Except we forgot about the "winning money" portion of the agenda and instead just had fun.

On our first night, we walked to our favorite truckstop/Denny's/motel/casino - the Wild Wild West.


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Andy: So, Elmo, Marilyn Monroe and Elvis Presley at a bus stop . . .

Rachel, Kara and I, waiting for the rest of the joke: And . . ?

Andy: No, right there. There's 3 people dressed like that waiting for the bus.

Sure enough, we turn are heads and see these 3 characters on the bench at the stop.

Only in Vegas.

Night number two brought our adventure all over the strip and included a visit to an off strip microbrewery. It was here that Andy maybe had a beer too many and we walked off to the next bar.

Kara: We should call Kerri. (pulls out phone)

Andy: YEAH! PHONE BOMB!! (pulls out his phone)

Nagging wife a.k.a. me who is worried about tipsy Andy breaking his expensive phone: Honey, put your phone away, we'll just use Kara's.

Andy: PUT YOUR FACE AWAY!

The next bar we were walking to happend to be a pub that had a 7 second challenge.


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Atop the bar were hourglasses, all timed to 7 seconds. You were allowed to order the beer of your choosing and if you could chug a full pint in under 7 seconds, your drink was free.

Andy: Guinness please.

Bartender: And ready, set, go. (turns hourglass)

Roughly 5 seconds later Andy set his glass down, victorious.

Bartender: Good job, man.

Andy: I feel like I was cheating. That was like drinking milk.

The rest of our visit was a bit tamer and we ended coming home within our budget. Including the time we spent at the airport after a lengthy flight delay during which Andy found the Star Wars slot machines and lost more money.

Happy Stuff: Girlfriends

Andy is great at being a husband. But, sorry honey, I just can't giggle with you while shoe shopping for hours on end.

My parents are great at being my Ma and Pa. But, sorry fam, I just can't make severly inappropriate jokes while drinking with you.

My dogs are great at being pets. But, sorry bears, even though you're great listeners I need someone who can actually talk back to me.

So that's where my girlfriends step in.

They are tried and true.

Some have known me since I was four years old and had my hair cut like I wanted to be the 5th Beatle.




That means I probably tattled on them and fought with them over a toy at some point.

But they're still here.



Some have known me since middle school.

That means they chose to be friends with me during a time when I had frizzy hair, zits and coke bottle glasses. Sorry, no picture available. I think I destroyed all evidence of this time of my life. Just trust me, I was awesomely adolescent.

But they're still here.



Some I didn't meet until college.



That means they definitely saw me drink to the point of puking which is always a super attractive thing to do.

But they're still here.



This could all just suggest that I pick friends with really low standards.

Or that I pay these people to still pretend they like me.

Or that I'm blackmailing them because I know a lot of their secrets.

But actually, we might just still be friends because they tattled on me, went through awkward puberty with me and poured and consumed the booze that made us fall down drunk.

Or maybe my standards are just as low as theirs.

The Groundhog's Day Blizzard

I don't know if you heard, but it snowed here last night.

Goat Milking Champion

I married Andy for many reasons.

I could write about how I married him because he's kind, handsome, has great fashion sense, blah, blah, blah, boring.

But the real reason I married Andy.

Was so that I could say the following:

"My husband was the Fowlerville Fair Goat Milking Champion."

It's true. Husband raised goats. And milked them. And apparently they have competitions at county fairs for that sort of thing.

Now that Andy is older he has traded the farm life for a suburban house and the goats for dogs.

And thankfully for everyone he's never tried to milk Toby.



He's also replaced the goat milk with another beverage.

Beer.

And last week, these two different passions intersected in the most glorious way.



That's his kegerator. Can you spot it?



Oh yes.




Handyman Andy took the top of his goat milking trophy and attached it to the top of a tap handle.



Now we just have to think of a great beer name to go along with that great tap.

My status.

Back in the day, asking about someone's status might have meant marital status.

Single? Married?

Or perhaps job status.

Employed? Unemployed?

Or maybe social status.

Middle class? Lower class?

Now, with the Facebook revolution, it seems status has evolved to mean: Whatever I'm doing, thinking, eating, smelling, drinking, etc. that I think the rest of the world would care about.

I came to find that FB had a fancy little program that threw a bunch of my statuses from 2010 into a cute little picture.



Some were related to clothing choices:

• Andy examining his wolf t-shirt in the mirror: "One, two . . . five wolves. One, two, three . . . ten moons. Two moons per wolf. That's the equation for awesomeness."


• "Will you be mad if I wear my deer t-shirt out tonight?" "No, why would I be mad?" "Because I'll be fighting off the chicks all night."


• Came home from a long run and got ready to jump in the shower. Whilst disrobing realized that I just ran 12 miles wearing my running shorts inside out.

Others were related to our travels:

• We attempted to spend as little as possible on groceries this week, so that we have more money to gamble with in Vegas.


• Engadine or bust!
  


• Andy's favorite part of the Dingle Marathon: The old woman picking blackberries in her front yard and handing them out to the runners and saying "Well done, lad." My favorite part of the Half: Petting a goat that was wandering along the course.

A few lot related to beer and drinking:

• Founders Brewery Tour! It's okay to drink beer because it's after noon.


• "Shots of Boone's Farm? What is this, kindergarten?"


• GPS died on the drive from BWI to Fredericksburg. Used a winery map to navigate instead. 3 wineries and 5 hours later we made it to Fredericksburg.


• Playing Taboo: KJ - "Ok, you get a shot for this once a year." Me - "Your birthday!" *time runs out* KJ - "Um, I was trying to get you to say 'flu.' "

Sports were of course involved:

• Final Four. Freak yes.


• HE'S SO FAR OUT!! HOW IS THAT SAFE?? YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!! WORST CALL EVER!
  


• Moose Tailgate. GO GREEN!
  

And one or two eight million related to the pups:

• Test driving a dog for the night.


• Toby is licking the sliding glass door. Which technically makes him a "window-licker." *sigh*


• Home sweet home. If you need me in the next 24 hours, I'll be attending the dog party on my living room floor.
  


• From the guests at our home: "Toby is a great alarm dog, but a horrible guard dog. He barked loudly at us when we got out of the car and then ran over, flopped down and showed us his belly."

So that's my status for 2010.

Or I'm just plain married, employed and lower class if you want to look at it that way.

A Look Back on 2010

I know everyone's been saying it.

"Man, this year really flew by!"

"How is 2010 over already?"

"Did I really eat 5 dozen Christmas cookies over the past 6 days?"

Somehow we survived another year, and despite Andy's efforts to break his face and Toby's efforts to never walk again, the family is limping into 2011.

Early in the year we welcomed a new member of the family.



We traveled to 17 more Michigan breweries, bringing us to a current total of 57 visited out of the 83 brewpubs and microbreweries in the state. We also attended 2 beer fests to further experience all that Michigan has to offer in beer.





Toby turned 2 years old and underwent 3 surgeries to correct his ACL injury.



We took various trips throughout the year to Milwaukee, Las Vegas, Ireland, Virginia, North Carolina and assorted travels around Michigan of course.



I watched a baby grow into a little human.



Andy ran two marathons, including his first one in Ireland. He set new PR's in every distance he ran - 5K, 25K and the marathons.



I ran various 5K's, a 10K, a 25K and a half marathon and was able to set new PR's in each distance.



Overall, the year was filled with good times with friends and family. I'm certain the new year will bring new travels, new beer, new runs and new fun.



So even though 2010 seems to have passed far too quickly, I'm ready to see what 2011 has in store for us.

Ummm, yeah, about your TPS reports . . .

So, I've been slacking.

But, I have super awesome excuses.

I bought Andy the Ken Burns' Baseball documentary for Christmas.

Hence, if I've been home, it's been on the TV. If there's ever a random baseball trivia game in my future, I'm going to own it.

I bought Andy beer for Christmas. And a new brewery opened up in Grand Rapids. And my friends have been in town and keep inviting me to bars. And my friends keep having birthday celebrations.

Hence, we've imbibing far more than usual. And after a long night of drinking, we purchased tickets to fly to Vegas in January. That's how much we've been imbibing.

Toby had surgery again. For the third time. For the same ACL injury. The vet referred to him as "clunky." As in "if I had realized how clunky he was, I would have added more reinforcements during the first surgery."

Hence, I've been hand feeding him ice cubes, rubbing his hamstring and crumbling Christmas cookies on his food in order to get him to eat.

Eventually though, I'll start blogging again.

Just as soon as Toby is healed, Andy's finished watching the Baseball documentary and they reinstate prohibition, that is.